How to Be Happy
By Michael Ireland
A web article ghostwritten for a client (client owns copyright)
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What does it mean to be happy? Many of us think that “we’ll be happy when … we get what we want”, whether that means a better job, a better house, a bigger car … fill in the blank. But true happiness is not about acquiring the things you want or finding yourself in ideal circumstances; true happiness is about surrendering to what is happening, right here, right now, and being content anyway. No matter what chaos might be unfolding around you, you can find something in it to appreciate. It might be the way the sun feels on your skin, or the way the colors around you flow one into the other as a rush of people flood by you – find one aspect of the hubbub you are in to focus on, and you will become the calm in the center of the storm! Being present, going with the flow of whatever is, right now, is the key. Be flexible, accommodating and easy-going – and allow this moment to be enough. Accept what is, tap into your inner sense of well-being – and happiness will be the result.
Are you the source of your own happiness? Or do you wait for others to make you happy? What things, people and circumstances have made you happy in the past? List those special things on a piece of paper, and tuck it into your pocket. Throughout your day, spend a few minutes making your memories come alive. See, hear, feel, taste, smell the reminiscences of those special moments. And, by the time you are done – you will have a smile on your face! This exercise will help you to remember that happiness is not an external thing. Happiness lives inside of you. Contentment abides in the depths of your soul – and all you have to do to access it is get still – breathe – and let your imagination carry you to your special, happy place.
From where you are in this moment, can you find your way to contentment? If you can’t, try this simple perception exercise. It’s known in some circles as “pivoting.” When you are feeling down, or something has interrupted your sense of calm, take a breath, slow down, stop. Breathe! Ask yourself, where would I love to be right now? Close your eyes. Transport yourself to that place in your imagination and make your experience of it as real as possible. Are you imagining a future moment, or remembering the past? What age are you? What are you wearing – feel the texture of the fabric of your clothes. Are you with someone or are you alone? What is the temperature? What things are in the space around you? Distill the moment, fill in all the details in living technicolor! Make it juicy! What are you feeling? Feel it! Make the image in your head dynamic, active. When you are ready, take a snapshot of that world, encapsulate your emotional senses in your heart and mind, and open your eyes. Notice now, how things have shifted – the physical world you are in is the same – but you have changed. You are the magnet in the middle of the scene that draws in happiness. You have the power to pivot in this way, all the time.
Another great exercise to beat the blues and get back to happiness is to imagine that your emotional world is like a long tunnel, with negative emotions on one end, and positive emotions on the other. Imagine yourself standing in that tunnel, and as you move along it, imagine that you move away from negative emotions, towards positive ones. If you are stuck in a negative mood, to get unstuck, pay attention to your innermost feelings. Get deep into “your tunnel of emotions.” Don’t think – feel. If you’re angry, for example, ask, “Can I find the part of this anger that is really me worrying about something?” Embrace that worry. And, once you do, ask, “What part of this worry can really be attributed to me feeling frustrated about something?” Feel frustrated. Now you’re on track, opening your awareness to what is really going on, and moving forward in your tunnel of emotion. Allow your feelings of frustration to manifest fully. Then ask, “What part of my frustration has to do with me feeling impatient?” “What part of this impatience is really a sense of boredom?” “What part of boredom can I accept?” “Can I just let it be and feel content?” As you move through this tunnel of emotions, from anger to worry to frustration to impatience, to boredom, you begin to feel momentum. As you move on up from boredom to contentment to hopefulness, and, ultimately, to happiness and ease, you will see the bright light at the end of the tunnel: peace of mind.
You can find your way through your tunnel of emotion to realize real peace of mind! You can listen for the deepest stillness that dwells inside of you. There are reminders all around you of happy events. If you are feeling sad, use your awareness of something near you to trigger a memory of a happy event and let the feeling of revisiting that past grow inside of you – let it make you smile. And then “fan that flame” and laugh. Put your happiness into action, let your experience of happiness rouse your senses! Be the happiness you want to have, and happiness will shine out of you and inspire others to happiness, too!
About the Author:
Michael Ireland is a writer, editor, and wellness practitioner. She specializes in metaphysics, spirituality, and self-development.
You can connect with her at:
michaelireland@shaw.ca